Tattoos: thoughts and life lessons


After finding this post by Dani Hampton of Sometimes Sweet I was reminded how much of a good thing tattoos have been for me! They are a great people-filter and have boosted my self-esteem and confidence levels. I've shared what each of my tattoos are and why I have them (here, here + here) but I haven't really talked about day-to-day living with tattoos.

There has never been a better people-filter. Sometimes I'm really surprised by the kind of people that are "into" tattoos. And then sometimes I'm completely disgusted with people. I'm always amazed at people's lack of respect for someone else's personal space if said person has a visible tattoo. I can't help but shake my head and silently giggle each and every time I get a "Can I see your tattoo?" while the person is simultaneously grabbing your arm and bending it into a magical contortionist pose. No response is needed on your part in these situations. Obviously you really wanted someone to turn your arm into a pretzel (duh).

But people are mostly just curious. And people are definitely bold about their opinions on tattoos. And they love telling you that "you're not the kind of person who should have tattoos". Having tattoos has helped me respect other people and love them for their differences more. It has also really taught me how to handle people and their differences. It's taught me how to be more forgiving.

My tattoos have taught me how to love myself. I was a much less confident person before I started getting them. A simple little black-outlined mermaid helped me love a part of my body that I found most disgusting. Getting a beautiful lady surrounded by pretty flowers, butterflies and a tea pot helped me love my skin color when her skin became the same as mine. A wise-looking wolf reminds me daily that my family is the strongest positive force in my life and to always be good to them. A portrait of a lady bordered with wings and magnolias reminds me that although my Meme doesn't "like" tattoos, she still loves me and wants me to be whoever I feel that I am (and she would probably DIE if she knew I got it for her). The little birdies on my back remind me daily to just breeeeathe (okay so maybe I sort of kept holding my breath while getting those tattooed and almost passed out a few times).

It's funny how much my skin has toughened up by getting delicate and pretty things put on it (which is really my only requirement when deciding what to get a tattoo of next). I've never noticed how many looks I get from strangers in public places and I still don't notice until I'm with my sister and she points it out to me. People are mostly just curious and looking isn't what is offensive to me.

It's the guy that told me I "made" him ask me to hike up my shorts by having a tattoo located on my outer thigh. I guess I "made" him suggest I start only wearing bikini bottoms to my coffee shop job from then on. Or that other guy who told me that people only get tattoos for attention (please note the paragraph from above--I never notice when people are looking at them).

But it does make my day when I get to show people the anti-stereotype of a tattooed person (I don't mean that in a snarky, sarcastic way--I genuinely feel glad at the opportunity). Sometimes I really surprise people by being a warm and friendly person!

So tattoos. A total blessing in my life. I've always known I'd have tattoos and one day I'll probably be almost completely covered in them. I don't think they're for everyone. My mentality on tattoos is completely different from a lot of other people's. I'm not afraid of not liking one of them one day or of aging or being pregnant with tattoos. I think tattooed wrinkly skin is probably prettier than plain ole wrinkly skin : ). I like the idea of being a tattooed bride (insert "mom" or "grandma" or "CEO" in there if ya wanna). Ohh! An old church-going lady. AWESOME.

What are your thoughts on tattoos? Anyone have an opposing opinion on what I've written here? I'd love to hear it! I'm also in the market to get another one (within the next month!). What are your favorite tattoos? I need ideas people!!



18 comments:

Sara Turner said...

Great post! (and subsequently caused me to take a read thru your other posts about your tattoos) I got my first one this year, it a lyric from the song that I have considered to be my theme for as far back as I can remember (Springsteen's Thunder Road, incidentally I'm seeing him in concert on Friday) I got it on my ribs, and brought in samples of his hand writing for the style. I had been planning on getting it for about 3 years (with variations on exactly what it would look like) and despite what everyone says about once you have one, I honestly am not in a rush for my second (thinking maybe when I defend my PhD).

I totally commend you for the kind of spirit you have, your tattoos are beautiful! But I doubt personally I'd be willing to get one just because it's beautiful, like I said I sat on mine for a long time before getting it. And to be honest, when considering locations, I did think about whether it would show on my hypothetical wedding day. I doubt I'll ever be an extensively tattooed lady, but I am thrilled at the way tattooing has evolved of late, such an incredible art form, and truly a media for telling personal stories!

Meghan Elizabeth said...

some people are always going to be rude out of ignorance, I think it's great to rep the positive aspects of tattoos :)

allie said...

i LOVE this and sent it to my dad who is absurdly rude when it comes to tattoos. i dont have any (yet) but i recently saw an outline of the world (in flat mode) and i cant get it out of my mind! i love it!

Amanda Holland said...

I love this so much! I got my first and second tattoos this year, a small bow on my ankle and a heart with Brand New lyrics on my side :) I am already thinking about #3 and plan to get it early next year! Thank you for putting my feelings into words! I would rather be old and covered in pretty memories than just plain old ;)

Kyla said...

This is such a great post! I don't actually have any tattoos myself, but I love admiring people that have tattoos, for whatever reason. Although I'm always curious, I never ask or touch someone to see their tattoos - I find that so rude! I have a few tattoo ideas that I've been thinking of getting, though my current job wouldn't allow me - boo. (I'm actually looking for a new job though).


I also totally understand what you mean about breaking the stereotype - I think it's great :)

Eat.Style.Play said...

While i wish I had sent more time on certain tattoo's i'm lucky enough to have found a place that's going to remove some of mine, but I actually plan on getting others in different spots. I am beyond annoyed with people grabbing my arm or my wrist, and then asking me what it means, so removing them from visiable places is going to help me a lot but those same ones' aren't well done and i got them when i was younger. I want to invest in better artist like the one who did my last tattoo. I loved this post!

Heather said...

Okay I had to go back and look at your tattoos since this is my first time visiting with you your Tattoos are gorgeous!! And I had to laugh at the term people filter that is a great way to put it hehe and so true. Having tattoos really changed things for me as well. I have gotten such negative comments on mine, in particular being a Christian from other Christians who love to quote the bible at me. I am still not used to being stared at because of them I really am a wall flower and I would rather not be noticed but I guess I should have thought of that before I went and got a bunch of tattoos. My kids love my tattoos. And I love nothing more when people are surprised that I am a bright, friendly, functional part of society, loving person even though I have ink on me :) ~ I enjoyed reading your post. If you like you can visit me at wattsfamilybythesea.blogspot.com

Katherine / Corgis & Cocktails said...

people stare at people, tattoos or not, but no one comes up and says ' hey can i see your left breast i see the corner peeking out there' so why do it with tattoos. i have to hide mine to my grandparents in laws (though its all over the internet so i would be amazed if someone hadn't told them or something by now) because they hate them so. and we are already bad enough for having lived together before we were married and living apart now that we are. anyhow - i love how personal tattoos are and the meanings, but i really only ask people i know about them. i really hate when people give me suggestions about my tatoo. once someone asked if the girl tattoo should have a bow? and i was like...well...she could...but...that's not my vision. the only red is the heart. it's balance. it's also done! and i don't know you. mostly people are really sweet about it, i have had a lot of people, from grandmas in wheelchairs at walmart to just people walking by stop and talk to me about my tattoo -it is admittedly very different and minimal, and i designed it so i really don't mind people saying it's nice - it's out there. i rarely notice people look at it either. anyhow - great post, i obviously loved reading it :D


<3 katherine
of corgis and cocktails // current giveaway

Lindsay Overbey said...

I agree with you. I don't have any visible tattoos though so I haven't experienced much of that. I'm still debating on whether or not I want to. We'll see :) A half sleeve is tempting me. Here's my pinterest tattoo board: http://pinterest.com/lindsayoverbey/tattoo-love/
AND... my tattoos if you are interested ;)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/dailydoily/3965584959/in/set-72157622481816030/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/dailydoily/7122648053/in/set-72157622481816030
♥Lindsay @ Daily Doily:: http://dailydoily.typepad.com/

Adrian said...

Great post! Isn't it amazing how strangers think it's okay to touch your tattooed body?? Or to ask silly questions like, "did it hurt?". People surprise me everyday. Recently, I've been dressing more conservatively (to cover my sleeves) when I go to certain places (like the mall or certain "Mormon" restaurants) because I'm just so sick of people gaucking at me! I could give a shit less if my tattoos offend someone. I didn't get tattooed for anyone but myself and I love my tattoos. I just want to avoid the stares, gasps, and rude comments! Tattoos are definitely not for everyone. I feel really confident with the way that I look and I wouldn't change a thing. I just wish I could change other people's negative opinions of tattoos in general.

Christine Lynas said...

Totally agree with all of this! AND i also think wrinkly tattooed skin would be prettier also!! I always say that to people who say "what's that gonna look like when you're 80? " I'll be 80! How is my skin going to look anyway!? I'll just look like a bad ass old lady hahaha

Yo sister said...

Ooooo I want to come when you get tattoo'd.

Cait Emma Smith said...

so, I love your passion for tattoos and this newest post. I've always admired people who take tattoos a bit more seriously. I have a tattoo - most people are surprised - and it has huge meanings. I have grown so much since I got it and I love it because it reminds me who I am and where I've been as a person. You are so inspirational in the way you love yourself and your body! Thanks so much for this post lovey x

Jessie {my mod style} said...

This is a GREAT post! I am 30 years old and plan to get my first tattoo this winter. Your post just made me want mine more. :) My family is begging me to not get it, as if I am a child still. Everyone always tells me that I am going to regret it. All the people who tell me this though are the people who hate them and find them disgusting. So of course THEY THINK I will regret it. I am in a place in my life where I finally figured out what I want and it's something that has meaning TO ME! Thanks for sharing. Oh yeah, I always stare at people with tattoos, but because I am jealous. ;)

Jessica said...

This is a wonderful post! I love tattoos! And I'll never understand people who are disgusted by them.

http://midwest-muse.net

Roni said...

Melanie, thank you for writing this. So much of what you said...all of what you said, applies to me and exactly how I feel. I never really thought about it as a filter to see who the accepting and more open minded people are. But that's true. I get that they're not for everyone. That's not what bothers me. What bothers me are the awful looks I get (and unlike you I notice EVERYONE gawking at them, whether in an interested and non-offensive way, or the ugly way) or the blatant convos strangers start that are sitting next to me on why they don't care for tattoos. I'm a super sweet person. I mean, I can be because I really am. BUT I'm also a HUGE bitch and that side is obviously not shown on the blog because there's no reason. Everyone's so sweet and it brings out only the best in me. But again, I am very outspoken and blunt myself. And I can be super not nice. It boils my blood when people stare because I'm a firm believe in the old fashioned sayings "it's not polite to stare" or "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all". While I can be asshole, it's ONLY in response to negativity brought on to me unjustifiably. That being said, I don't ever say ugly things to people ever if I don't like something they're wearing or the way their hair looks. I am 100% the opposite. I'm that girl in a grocery store that compliments a total stranger pushing their cart because I like their hair or bag or smile! Yes, I've complimented smiles. It can be creepy but I'm not too shy about being nice to strangers. At least they know there are still sweet people in the world. But I digress. I also don't stare if I'm not gonna offer up a nice compliment. So this pretty much just piggybacks on everything I just said. I don't say anything mean for no reason and I don't stare. If I do stare, you better believe it's because I like something you're doing/wearing and I WILL let you know. Why can't all people be like that? When I had my red hair everyone had a staring problem with me and I verbally asked them "What the *bleep* are you looking at?" My husband would have to remind me that not only do I have the most loud hair ever, but I have tattoos, and a lot of them. People are likely going to stare. To which I calmly respond with my two quotes up there and how it's rude. He agrees but he just says, "well, not all people are thoughtful like that". And it's true. The whole filtering process you speak of really says alot. Even though people don't like tattoos is one thing, but the people who just have to put their two cents out there are showing me what kind of people they are. And I just wouldn't have anything to do with people like that anyway. Those old people that really surprise me by commenting nicely to my tattoos always throws me for a loop. They freak out when I speak and I'm not what they thought I'd be like. Which is understandable, but being a tattooed person, I know that you can't just auto-assume people with tattoos are mean or bad or convicts.
Anywho, this was bound to get me on a tangent, which is why I saved it on my computer for so long waiting to read and respond. Thanks for the post. And dude I LOL'd when I read that you held your breath and almost passed out! hahahaha ;) I know this is weird but I love the feeling of tattoos. It feels relaxing to me. I just zone out and get calm. It's the best.

Kyla said...

This is such a great post! I don't actually have any tattoos myself, but I love admiring people that have tattoos, for whatever reason. Although I'm always curious, I never ask or touch someone to see their tattoos - I find that so rude! I have a few tattoo ideas that I've been thinking of getting, though my current job wouldn't allow me - boo. (I'm actually looking for a new job though).


I also totally understand what you mean about breaking the stereotype - I think it's great :)

Eat.Style.Play said...

While i wish I had sent more time on certain tattoo's i'm lucky enough to have found a place that's going to remove some of mine, but I actually plan on getting others in different spots. I am beyond annoyed with people grabbing my arm or my wrist, and then asking me what it means, so removing them from visiable places is going to help me a lot but those same ones' aren't well done and i got them when i was younger. I want to invest in better artist like the one who did my last tattoo. I loved this post!

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